Pamper Yourself! 10 Ways to Totally Self-Indulge

Summer is over! I felt it as soon as I stepped outside this morning—the air was crisp with a snap that was nonexistent just last week. As I watched the pool company close up my little backyard oasis, I couldn’t help but feel nostalgic for the lazy, relaxing, and self-indulgent pace ofsummer.

Probably because the day September hit it seemed that the pace of work picked up in an instant. My phone was ringing off the hook, I had meetings scheduled back to back, my friends were creeping out of the woodwork eager to reconnect. Just halfway through the month, I was feeling a little crazed—and very depleted.

But I’ve regained my composure, and here’s how: a little self-indulgence.

It doesn’t have to be costly or time-consuming, but taking care of yourself is critical if you want to maintain a sense of sanity and momentum going into the winter. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or underappreciated, read on for 10 simple ways to make yourself feel absolutely spoiled—and to refuel your engine for the long haul!

 1. Have a Picnic for One

If the weather permits, grab a book or a stack of magazines, a cozy blanket, and a basket filled with your favorite tasty treats. Find a shaded spot in the park by a colorfully-leafed tree and just chill.

2. Chocolate, Baby!

Scope out your neighborhood for a gourmet chocolate shop and treat yourself to three luscious truffles (or four…or five). Make sure you eat them slowly, savoring the flavors; make the experience last.

 3. Soak in a Hot Tub in the Dark

Add some essential oils (lavender and mint are really lovely), dim the lights, light a candle, close your eyes, and give yourself a full hour to unwind.

 4. Enjoy High Tea

Just because you aren’t British doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a posh midafternoon snack. Indulge in scones, clotted cream, and a few petit fours, topped off with a pot of specialty tea.

 5. Indulge in a Warm Bed and tub of Haagen Dazs

It may sound cliché, but nothing soothes me after a long day of work like a dose of mindless reality television and a tub of Sticky Toffee Pudding under the covers.

 6. Head North with Tunes

Drive—with no destination in mind. Blare music, roll down the windows, and fire up the seat warmers. Something about being alone in the car heading nowhere is infinitely calming.

 7. Breathe Deeply and Consciously

You can do this anywhere for a quick pick-me-up. Take at least 30 deep, conscious, slow breaths—four seconds in, four seconds out. Sit quietly while you’re doing it, avoid distractions, and keep your eyes closed.

 8. Whiten Your Teeth

Several over-the-counter kits really work! And you no longer have to commit to drooling through those disgusting strips every night for two weeks—you can whiten in just one application. White teeth make you look brighter and more energized. And chances are, if you look brighter, you’ll feel that way, too.

 9. Take a Naked Nap

(Alone, or not!) Make your bed with the softest sheets you own (or buy new ones!), surround yourself with lots of pillows, slip out of your clothes, and enjoy.

 10. Smell the Flowers

Literally. It has been proven that floral scents are mood manipulators, and flowers can actually make you happy. Treat yourself to your favorite bouquet and place it somewhere easily visible—and smellable.

 Doing one or two of the things on this list each week will help you feel a little pampered. And when we work as hard as we do, we all need to feel pampered.

 What self-indulgent strategies do you use to help you get through your work week?

Photos courtesy of J.B. Hill and Dennis Wong.

Keeping Your Entrepreneurial Cool: Tips for Managing Chaos

by Ruth Zive

I recently left my well-paying, secure, perfectly enjoyable job in the non-profit world to start my own business. Did I mention that I have five children (one of whom has special needs), a dog, a husband (who also recently launched a new business), and lots of bills to pay? But I’ve long felt in my gut that this was my path, so despite these “obstacles,” I finally took the plunge.

The year since I’ve made that decision has been a hectic, exciting, stressful, demanding, and exhilarating journey. So far, I have no regrets. But I do have less time, less energy, and less focus. My new business has sucked the life out of me (okay, I’m exaggerating—a smidge), and I’ve had to become very deliberate about how I leverage my spare moments to keep myself sane. I’m not talking here about taking baths or long walks or putting aside time for date night. I’m talking multi-tasking, stress-busting, keep-your-head-screwed-on-right tactics.

If you’re thinking of starting your own business—or just feeling overworked—consider these tips to find some balance in your life (and lower your shrink bill considerably).

1. Turn off the Internet 

I’m starting out easy here, but you heard me. Turn that Internet off for one hour—at least. Our brains have become overloaded with tweets and blogs and emails and pokes. You can’t beproductive (or see straight) if Tweetdeck is running in the background and your friends are tagging your pictures on Facebook. For at least one hour during your workday, ideally at the same time every day, take an Internet break and focus exclusively on whatever real-life task you have at hand.

 2. Delegate to Others

Delegate to your spouse, your friends, your parents, coworkers, even your children—anyone with a pulse. Lean on others, and don’t be shy asking for help and calling in favors. There is no shame in needing support, especially if it helps you to be the best that you can be. If you are a mom, give your children responsibilities. I’m not advocating child labor, but nurturing a sense of independence and work ethic in your children will not only help you stay sane, but it will also help prepare them for the responsibilities that life will inevitably bring.

3. Plan for Retirement

Advanced financial planning might seem like a ludicrous proposition if money is tight and you’re forgoing your morning coffee just to pay the mortgage. But finding a way to put aside funds foryour future is important, no matter what your financial situation. Moreover, knowing that you are sticking to your plan will give you peace of mind during what will likely be a very unsettling time in your life.

4. Have Lots of Sex with Someone You Love

This may sound crass, but it’s true! Regular sex not only reduces stress levels, but it keeps you connected emotionally to the person you love. And what could be better when you’re feeling tense and alone in your new solo venture?

 5. Celebrate Your Success

With the right focus, determination, and hard work, success will follow. But it won’t happen all at once, and it’s important to celebrate your accomplishments along the way. When you hit small milestones, take a short vacation, have a day at the spa, or buy yourself a new handbag. You deserve it!

Integrate these strategies into your regular routine, and your entrepreneurial journey will be much more enjoyable and grounded. From one entrepreneur to another, stay busy, stay sane, and good luck!

It might be a myth that women can “have it all,” but don’t throw in the towel just yet. If anyone understands how to balance a job, family and friends, and maintaining sanity, too, it’s Ruth Zive. Every other Tuesday, check out her column “Flying by the Seat of My Pants,” on finding your passion, managing chaos, and having a full life at and outside of work.

Self-Promotion Lessons Inspired By Forbes’ 100 Most Powerful Women

One of the lessons is to “put yourself out there.” Indeed, if you look at theWorld’s 100 Most Powerful Women 2012 you see the success from self-promotion:  Sara Blakely selling her Spanx firsthand in the foyer of Neiman Marcus or Fawzia Koofi publishing a book and announcing, despite death threats, her intention to run for President of Afghanistan. But how exactly do you put yourself out there?

 “Put” = what do you do to self-promote

Self-promotion can be a 1:1 conversation with your boss about your accomplishments to date and your near-term goals. Or it can be a social media campaign to develop an engaged audience and a powerful brand that attracts opportunities to you. Or it can be multiple things including both proactive, scheduled meetings with decision-makers like your boss and more passive marketing efforts.

The best self-promotion is something you will consistently do. Consistency is key because putting yourself out there isn’t a one-time effort but rather something you must regularly do. Opportunities abound at different times, and you want to stay front-of-mind on an ongoing basis. Therefore, where you have some flexibility in picking what you will do to promote (e.g., speaking, writing, social media, networking via trade associations or conferences), you want to pick something you are willing to do for the long-term. But there are some things you must do (e.g., making sure your boss and senior management know your value) so you can’t only focus on where you’re comfortable.

 “Yourself” = what parts of yourself do you showcase

Even after you’ve decided that, yes, you will self-promote and, yes, you will embrace both active and passive mediums, you still need to decide what you are going to promote. Your accomplishments, skills and experience are obvious parts of your package that you want to showcase. But you also need to decide which specific accomplishments, skills and experience are most relevant to share.

If you are aiming for a leadership role, then the results you’ve achieved before as an individual contributor, while impressive, may be less relevant, than examples where you propose ideas or set strategy. If the company is moving in a direction that emphasizes a skill you have, but that is not a majority of your background, you may still want to emphasize it. You pick what your showcase based, not just on what is authentic to you, but also what resonates to your target audience.

 “Out There” = who are you trying to attract

The best self-promotion resonates to your target audience, so you need to know whose attention you are seeking. If your goal is advancing in your current company, who are the decision-makers for promotions? If your goal is a career change, who makes the hiring decisions for the roles you want? One of my clients was a superstar in his large company but this didn’t help his dream of running a start-up in a related but distinct industry. The decision-makers who knew him were senior executives, and now his audience needed to include venture capitalists and investors funding the start-ups he prized.

Even if you want to stay where you are, your audience should always be broader than just your boss because opportunities exist both inside and outside of your current company. Competitor companies, potential clients and customers, executive recruiters, media, investors, even networking contacts who may refer you are all part of the audience “out there.”

Putting yourself out there is not a broad, amorphous concept. To put yourself out there effectively means you practice self-promotion, you showcase your value, and you engage the audience who are making the decisions or know about the opportunities. You raise your odds of serendipitous outcomes, unexpected offers, and lucky breaks.

Caroline Ceniza-Levine writes success tips for career and business, having launched a range of businesses